


Milk and Honey

by KittenContagious137



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underswap, F/F, F/M, M/M, Reader Is Not Chara, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader is a healer, Reader is a single mom, Reader makes dumb decisions, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Swearing, Unplanned Pregnancy, and knows how to use it, post pregnancy, postpartum recovery, reader has magic, slight mentions of past abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-20 10:51:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9487961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittenContagious137/pseuds/KittenContagious137
Summary: You've known about Monsters for years, but just pushed it aside as some of your grandparents' old folktales like Fairy Circles and children that were turned into swans by an evil witch. Even though you have your own magic, you never thought that Monsters could exist outside of those kinds of stories.But when the barrier breaks and they suddenly flood the surface and the city you had moved too, you don't know how to react. What if they view your magic as a weapon or an insult because of the way they had been treated?You didn't want to risk it, so you never told anyone outside of the family that you had lost about your ability to heal, though that didn't stop you from helping those you could, even after you got pregnant.But that's all about to change, only two weeks since your son, Austin, has been born.After finishing your shopping, you hear a strange sound in an alley behind you. When you go to investigate, not only do you find a severely beaten skeleton, but you decide to take him home with, not just you, but your newborn son as well, to try to help him.Maybe, just maybe, you can find acceptance, and maybe something more?*Title may change, rating may also change.





	1. A Soul's Pull

The sound of breaking glass caused you to pause in putting your newborn son in the car. _Maybe it's some kids messing around,_ you found yourself thinking, shifting the infant car seat until it clicked into the dock.

The rain trickled down your spine as you straightened, giving you a chill. That chill suddenly morphed into a twisted sense of pain as your SOUL _shrieked_ once the sickening sound of breaking bones met your ears. Grasping your chest with one hand, you used your other hand to shut the car door. A small twitch of your fingers signaled the appearance of a greenish-blue glow that lined the seams of the doors of your old, bright yellow, Saturn Vue, sealing the still-running vehicle better than any locks could.

Satisfied, you turned to glance at the alley behind you, the source of all of the noise that had set you on edge. You had to about-face quickly though as a group of seven young men, the smallest of which was still a head taller than you and had almost three times your muscle mass, strolled out of the shadows. They were laughing and jeering at each other, their words overlapping until you couldn't understand a single thing they said.

Luckily, they turned the opposite way down the sidewalk, not a single one of them even glancing your way.

You waited for a long moment before turning to enter the alley, rolling your steps to walk silently. Your SOUL was still rioting against you, feeling as though it was trying to rip itself out of your chest, but you steadfastly ignored it, stepping over a broken bottle.

A quiet groan caused you to pause, squinting through the water on your glasses as you looked around.

There!

Sprawled over several sagging cardboard boxes, was a thin person, their orange hoodie obscuring their face. As you approached, your magic automatically began gathering in your fingertips.

Now at the person's side, you noticed that they were extremely tall. You were only around 5'2", and they looked to be more than 7'. _Joy_ , you thought, leaning closer to gently move their hood back.

A solid white skull looked back at you... Well, not really as their eye... sockets (?) were closed. You happily ignored the logical part of yourself that said that that wasn't possible as you dithered on your next course of action.

Unlike with humans, you couldn't just pour your magic into a Monster. Humans could absorb large amounts of healing magic and still be out like a blown light bulb for hours, meaning you could have healed them without their knowledge, shaken them awake and been on with your day. Monsters, on the other hand, were made of magic. If you pumped foreign magic into an injured Monster, their own magic could possibly try to counteract it until they were completely drained, leading to Magic Deficiency, which would make a monster "Fall Down". At least, that's what your grandparents had told you.

You didn't plan on testing the theory.

Taking a deep breath, you brought your left hand up to lightly touch a crack in the Monster's skull. Your magic flowed slowly from your fingertips, giving you the familiar feeling of dipping your fingers into a gently moving mountain stream, before beginning to take shape. Before your eyes, the bone stitched itself together, becoming smooth once more. A soft pop from their mandible signified the resetting of a jaw hinge and you winced in sympathy.

Your other hand joined in, resting upon the skeletal hand that lay haphazardly over a box by your thigh. Your magic flowed up their arm, immediately finding a sealing a crack in the ulna and a spider web of them on the humerus.

So far, so good. You bit your lip; now for the hard part.

Bringing your hands together for a moment, you looked toward the sky, or more accurately, the stars that were hidden behind the clouds, to calm yourself. Then, before your nerves could stop you or that annoying little voice in your head told you not to do it, you gently placed your hands over the skeleton's cloth covered rib cage.

Directly over where his SOUL would sit during a _fight_.

You waited for the backlash of magic, the battle of wills you knew you would lose to keep them from draining themselves... but, it never came.

For a moment, you thought that they had already passed away, but you knew better. They would have turned to dust if that were true.

Instead, your SOUL pulsed painfully and the once gentle stream of your magic was now raging rapids threatening to drag along with the current. You bit your lip again, this time to hold in a scream at the icy agony pricking your hands, but you dared not move away.

Four ribs had broken clean away. Thankfully the pieces had yet to turn to dust and your magic gently settled them back into place before sealing the breaks.

Your hands almost felt like the skin was being ripped away over an open flame, but, if you pulled away, both of you would die.

Three more ribs as well as their sternum were covered in hairline fractures that sealed quite quickly compared to their skull and the other ribs.

Just what had those bastards done to them? And why? You knew that speciesism existed and you knew humanity’s track record with accepting anything new, but you didn’t think anyone was stupid or cruel enough to attack creatures that were literally made of magic and **_compassion_** , for fuck’s sake!

Taking a deep breath, you wrestled your magic back under control. Their other injuries weren't life-threatening and you had to slow down, or you would burn out before you were done.

Your magic now flowed slowly over the rest of the skeleton, resetting several dislocated joints you were sure had to be agonizingly painful, and healing a dent in their left fibula.

You pulled back, slightly alarmed that your SOUL had unceremoniously decided to hijack your control and logic but you were pleased that you hadn't had to use all of your magic to heal the Monster.

Speaking of which, they had yet to move.

Another moment of dithering and you cast a light sleeping spell over them, just to be on the safe side (you didn't want them to panic), before attempting to maneuver the extremely tall being up so you could grasp them in a fireman's carry. Your hand slid over something squishy that smelt like death and you fought the urge to vomit.

Your magic flowed again, this time in response to the little flares of pain from your lower abdomen. While the Monster didn't exactly weigh a ton (heh, skele-ton), they certainly weren't light either, and you weren't yet healed enough after giving birth to be lifting large amounts.

Thankfully, you hadn't needed episiotomy stitches due to your magic, otherwise, you would be screwed. On the downside, however, magic couldn’t speed up your recovery from a natural birth by too much. You just had to be careful… which you would start tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow sounded good.

You glanced out passed the mouth of the alley and, finding the coast was clear, you headed back to the car. After absorbing the magic sealing the doors, you opened your passenger door and eased your burden inside. Amazingly, you didn't knock their skull into the roof of the vehicle.

After buckling your unforeseen passenger in, you leaned the seat back and checked on your son, who was still sound asleep.

Thanking the heavens for small miracles, you climbed into your own seat and started the 15-minute drive home.

* * *

 

Upon arriving, you carried your son in first and, after re-scrubbing your hands with a wet-wipe, settled him in the old fashioned bassinet in the living room, glad that he could sleep so deeply between feedings. Next, you had to gently ease the skeleton back onto your aching shoulders to carry them inside.

Getting them through the door, however, was harder than you expected. You were certain that you would have dislocated your own shoulder with how many times it slammed into the door if it wasn’t for the fact you put a small barrier around you and your new companion. _Why couldn’t I have telekinesis or something?_ you asked yourself, not for the first time.

Finally! You were inside! Your original plan had been to place the skeleton in your bed, but with the ache in your abdomen growing, you decided to go with just placing them on your soft couch. You weren’t going to even attempt to go up the stairs while carrying anyone heavier than your baby. You _were_ supposed to be taking it easy and limit the amount you had to carry, after all.

Yeah, that worked out well, didn’t it?

Another run out to the car and you could finally lock it and put away your groceries and the diaper bag/backpack thing that could hold enough supplies for an army. With those chores done, you ran up the stairs (idiot, you’re supposed to be taking it EASY!) to find some clean clothes for your guest, and yourself. A bright red _Deadpool_ t-shirt that hung down to your knees and a pair of oversized black basketball shorts would work for the overly tall skeleton and for yourself, you grabbed a gray nursing gown with two closures that ran in diagonals from the collar, which would make for easy feeding for you, that was decorated with cute little orange and black roses at the bottom and matching polka-dots at the collar, and a pair of black cotton leggings and some underwear. You stacked your items in the washbasin the hospital had given you (yay for freebies) and grabbed the bottle of lavender and chamomile baby wash a co-worker had given you. You didn’t particularly like the brand, and your son’s skin was too sensitive for the cleanser, meaning you had to use it somehow.

Heading back down the stairs, you placed the clean clothes on the coffee table and went to the downstairs bathroom to fill the basin with hot water. Grabbing two washcloths, you made your way back to the living room and the other two occupants to your home. Kneeling next to the couch with the basin on the floor, you carefully eased the skeleton up and gently tugged their bright orange hoodie off of them. You huffed when you saw a large tear down the left side seam as you were kneeling on their right, but you resolved to stitch it up for them after it made a run through the washing machine.

Wait a second…

You gently reached over them, only to feel something slimy meet your fingertips. Biting back a squeal at the unsavory discovery you lifted the black tank top from the Monster’s ribs and slipped that off as well. You eyed the stark white of the bones against the backdrop of your forest green couch, surprised at just how much thicker than a human’s they were. They were also much stronger, your magic told you after a cursory sweep to be sure you hadn’t missed anything.

It just made you all the more upset that you had found them like you did. Those bastards would have killed another human more than five times over with the force they had put behind their attack.

You dipped one of your washcloths into the basin and poured a nickel sized amount of baby wash onto it. Quickly lathering it up, you began your task of cleaning your new companion by softly scrubbing their skull. They actually had a narrow facial structure, though their jawline, er, mandible, was well defined and square. Though, you could clearly see their teeth, you had the distinct impression that they were frowning.

It was probably the same thing as with their closed eye sockets, or something. Magic, you supposed.

You rinsed out the cloth and wiped off their skull, using the dry one as a dry cloth because it was the same thing you would do with your son after he spit up. Re-lathering the wet cloth, you moved on to their cervical vertebrae, which you cleaned as softly but as quickly as you could. You really didn’t like how fragile the bones felt under your fingertips.

Moving on to their clavicle, you were able to speed up slightly, more comfortable with the sturdier bones, even as you had to lift them to wipe off their scapula, the backs of their ribs, and the thoracic and lumbar vertebrae.

Once done, you quickly tugged your _Deadpool_ shirt over their head and passed their arms through before tugging it straight.

Now, onto the lower half!

Yeah, you actually weren’t that enthusiastic about it.

Glancing at the skeleton’s black sweatpants, you grimaced. Sure, their hoodie and tank top were stained with what looked, and smelled, like rotten tomatoes and peaches, but that was still better than what was obviously a mix of rotten potatoes, carrots, alfredo sauce… and was that raw ground chicken?

Nope. Not today.

For the sake of your furniture and your nose, you pushed any thoughts of what you were about to do from your mind and quickly removed their red converse and black socks, taking the shoes to the little area by the door and dropping them next to your own, only to return and see that you were still holding the dirty pair of socks. Shaking your head at your absentmindedness, you dropped the socks on the steadily growing pile of laundry. Still ignoring your morals, you quickly removed their sweatpants. Thankfully, these didn’t have any visible tears under all of the muck.

The first thing you noticed after you dropped the pants with the rest of the soiled clothing, was that they, er, _he_ , was wearing a pair of black boxers, patterned in little white cartoon _bones_.

“Seriously?” you asked the silent room, knowing full well that they wouldn’t answer. Though, your son did move one of his pudgy little arms.

You shook it off, repeating your pattern with the washcloths and baby wash, this time going from just beneath the bottom hem of the boxers on his femurs, all the way down to his distal phalanges. Finally done, you slid the shorts up his incredibly long legs and tugged them into position on his pelvis.

Nodding to yourself, you gathered the dirty laundry and took it back into the laundry room by the bathroom, dumping it all into the washing machine. Looking down at yourself, you groaned softly. You were also covered in gunk, from the alfredo stains on your sweater to the flecks of mashed potato that clung to your thighs.

You gathered your cleaning materials, emptying the water down the drain in the tub and put them away, downstairs this time, and made yet another trip into the living room for your clothes. A hot and soothing shower later put you into better spirits. You tossed your dirty laundry in with the strangers and started the load.

You had wandered into the kitchen to pour two glasses of iced Sea Tea to take into the living room when a baby’s wail caused you to jump. Looks like your break was over. You gathered the glasses of tea and your nursing pillow and turned to head back.

You didn’t even notice the gentle pulse in your SOUL that meant any magic you had cast was over when Austin’s cries suddenly quieted into curious babbling. Pausing behind the archway that led to your destination, you peeked around it.

This time, you felt your SOUL as it dropped into the pit of your stomach.

Your guest was awake and was standing over your son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Link to image of the Reader's Nursing gown https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01E02IGHW/ref=twister_B01E02I1PE
> 
> Also, I really shouldn't post things when I haven't slept in more than thirty hours... I came back to edit this chapter while working on the second, so it should read much better. ... And I forgot to move the link...
> 
> So, in summation, I can't blog for shit on tumblr, and I apparently can't post for shit here.
> 
> How do I technology?


	2. "Milk"-ing It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus awakes and gets to learn a little bit more about human biology.

He awoke to an infant’s whine. Opening one eye socket, he found himself gazing up at a _bone_ white ceiling. He smirked a little before turning his skull, noticing the rich, if old, wooden paneling of the walls and the few photos in frames that were scattered around. There was a coffee table to his direct right, littered with what looked to be a half-finished blanket with the crochet hook sitting in an incomplete stitch and a skein of matching yarn was connected to it, topped with a couple of stuffed animals. Directly next to the toys, however were a pile of objects that he immediately recognized as his own, including his cell phone, which he snatched up quickly.

And… it was dead. He’d been too lazy to charge it before he’d left for work. Of course.

Another whine caused him to sit up, only now noticing the bassinet that had been by the sofa arm his skull had been pillowed against, complete with a white canopy and lacey cloth covering the sides. He stood up and peered down at the _human_ baby that was beginning to wail. Where was the mother?

Without knowing why, he reached out with a hand, which the baby immediately grabbed. He marveled at the fragile bones in the baby’s hand. They were nothing like Sans’ when he had been a baby bones.

The baby had stopped crying, instead fascinated by the phalanges in front of his face. Little legs kicked off the receiving blanket as their other hand joined in exploring the bones presented. Happy cooing and burbles emanated from the bassinet.

“Heh.” He grinned, going to shove his free hand into his pocket… only to realize that he wasn’t wearing his hoodie. Eye sockets widening, he glanced down, eyeing the red _Deadpool_ shirt and the slightly too short shorts that covered him in confusion. Where were his clothes?!

Speaking of which, where was _he_? Judging by the size of the room he was in, it was a large home and he could just see the edge of a stairway, signaling at least two stories, possibly three.

The last he remembered, he was heading to the small grocery store on the corner near Asgore’s apartment after work. He’d been low on honey and was going to pick up a chocolate bar for Chara because they’d passed their science test. The neighborhood didn’t have any large houses in it, being comprised of apartment buildings and small family-run stores… So, what was he doing here?

A small hand lightly tapped his scapula over his shirt, causing him to stiffen. “Are you alright?” a soft, alto, voice asked.

When he turned, the first thing he noticed was that she was actually _shorter_ than Sans. The second thing, however, was that she had the same pale blue-green eyes as the baby that was now trying to **suckle on his finger!**

The woman frowned when he refused to answer her, instead, he was trying to gently rescue his hand. She sighed and crouched next to the crib, reaching into a hidden bottom shelf to pull out a disposable diaper. “Sir, you were pretty badly hurt when I found you. I’d like it if you’d tell me if you’re in any pain.”

Papyrus raised a brow bone, watching as she undid the snaps on the baby’s footed pajamas. The kid was still nomming on him though, and he really didn’t have the _heart_ to pull away. Heh. “I’m _femur_ ’n fine, _tibia_ honest.” It was true though, he felt better than he had in months.

**_SNERK!_ **

The woman, halfway through undoing the infant’s diaper, pressed a hand over her mouth as she leaned over the bassinet. Giving in, she laughed, her voice ringing through the room. “Oh my gods! That was awful!”

“You laughed.” He couldn’t help grinning down at her.

“I know, and I hate it.” She rolled those beautiful eyes and finished her task before glancing back up at him. “And don’t tell me, but I bet you’ve got a _skele-ton_ more of them just raring to go. That last one wasn’t even all that _humerus._ ” A pause as she smacked her forehead. “Great, now I’m doing it.”

Papyrus snickered. “I dunno, I thought they were real _rib-ticklers._ ”

The last snap of the baby’s clothes signaled that she was done just before she lifted the child from his little nest, her left arm moving to support his head while the right supported his body.

He still hadn’t let go of the Monster’s finger.

The two adults shared a glance before woman sighed and shifted the baby to one arm to use her other hand to try to work his phalanges free of the tiny, but strong, fingers. “Now, Austin…”

She trailed off, but Papyrus hardly noticed, because, as soon as her skin touched his bone, his vision tunneled and he nearly collapsed as the floor pitched beneath his bare feet.

A fierce sense of SAFETY, WARMTH, CONCERN flashed across his SOUL, almost overwhelming him.

And, as suddenly as the feelings flooded into him, they were gone, replaced by a feeling of a condensation-slick glass being pressed into his hands. Shaking his head to clear it, he found himself staring into those eyes again from where their owner was kneeling in front of him. Pools of pale green shifting into cyan then a darker blue at the edges of her irises, with little flecks of lavender and gold shifting throughout. Huh, maybe a human’s eyes _were_ windows to the SOUL after all.

Her lips were moving, and only as he noticed that, did his hearing return. “…alright? Please answer me.”

“What?” he croaked, his throat feeling dry despite the fact that he didn’t even have one.

“Are you back with me?” Her eyes were searching his sockets and her hands were still supporting his around the glass.

His magic flared slightly when he noticed that she was giving him an anchor, but he blinked to cover it. “Did I go somewhere?” Why would a human that he didn’t even know attempt to steady him in what could be a panic attack?

“You lost your balance and kept muttering about something about your brother being safe. Do you need to call your brother?” Her voice was soft and calm, steady even though he could almost see the worry written in her gaze. Even the baby was quiet where he was laying against the skeleton’s femur, shifting only a little on top of his blanket. “Do you think your brother might be in trouble?”

Papyrus shook his head slowly. “Nah. It was just an old nightmare.” _I hope._

She didn’t look convinced, but her lips quirked up into a small smile anyway. “Would you like to call him? You can use my phone if you’d like.”

“Sure. Thanks, kid.” He couldn’t stop the snicker when her cheeks puffed out in annoyance, making her look almost like a marshmallow.

“I’m not a kid!” she objected, pulling one of her hands away from his to reach under the nightgown she wore, revealing a pocket on the hip of her leggings, and pulled out a smartphone in a plain black snap-on case. She set it on her folded legs instead of passing it to him though. “Can you at least drink some of your tea first? You’ll feel better, I promise.”

Glancing down, he recognized the pre-made Sea Tea that was being sold in grocery stores everywhere. It was made by Monsters, but it was being marketed to humans as an almost instant pain reliever and the proceeds went to helping Monsters find homes above ground and to protect them from the “Human Supremacy” groups that had started popping up. He supposed that a new mother would keep some handy during her recovery. As he brought the glass to his teeth, he noticed that while his hands shook, her much, much smaller ones were steady, making it possible for him to slowly sip the drink. It was a little bitter for his tastes, but it still made him feel better and his magic was replenished.

Odd, what had caused him to almost run out of magic?

When his shaking had stopped all together, she removed her hands and passed him the phone, her smile sliding into an actual one. As he dialed his brother’s number, he watched as she took a sip from another glass of tea that had been on the coffee table, wincing when the sounds of her vertebrae popping as the tension was released from them.

She scooped up Austin and settled at the other end of the couch, a throw pillow at her back in the crook of the sofa arm and the back and another, odd-shaped pillow sitting atop her thighs. The baby was placed on the pillow on her lap and she began to undo the snaps that led down the left side of her chest, but stopped suddenly and looked up at him, her cheeks a pale pink. “Um, you don’t mind if I feed him in here, do you? I’m too tired to trust myself in going too far.”

He nodded, his thumb hovering over the “Call” button. How was she going to feed the child? She hadn’t brought a bottle with her.

“Thank you,” she almost whispered, smiling that soft smile again. Then, she unceremoniously finished undoing the buttons and pulled out a breast.

Shocked, he didn’t realize that he had tapped the button.

You had taken your eyes off of your guest as you shifted your swollen breast until Austin latched on and began to suckle. The baby’s eyes immediately locked onto your face and you were once again overwhelmed by how _much_ you loved this baby. You didn’t used to believe your mother’s words about the love a parent can feel for a child, but now… Heh, it was overwhelming to say the least.

**_“HELLO? THIS IS THE MAGNIFICENT SANS! WHO IS CALLING?”_ **

The voice suddenly blaring out of the little speaker on your phone caused you to jerk your head up and your guest moved the phone away before switching it to speakerphone.

“Hey, bro,” your guest had leaned back, a soft smile on his teeth as he spoke.

Your smile only widened at the scene. You could actually see just how much he cared for his brother. Which only meant that that nightmare had affected him worse than you had originally thought.

**_“PAPYRUS! WHERE ARE YOU? I SWEAR, IF YOU’RE CALLING ME FROM MUFFET’S AGAIN, I’LL BE VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE TOO DRUNK TO COME HOME!”_** the voice over the phone shouted, causing you to muffle a snigger. Just who was the older brother, anyway?

“Nah, Sans. I’m sitting in a nice lady’s house drinking tea. You could say that I’m having a _tea_ lightful time.” Papyrus’s grin had widened, and he took a loud **SLURP** out of his glass.

Oh gods… was he _always_ like this?

**_“MWEH! PAPY, YOU KNOW BETTER THAN TO SLURP LIKE THAT! AND STOP IT WITH THOSE AWFUL PUNS!”_** the other voice whined. Yep, that was the younger brother… **_“WAIT! DID YOU MAKE A NEW FRIEND?!”_**

The two of you shared a glance. Papyrus looked like he had expected that question, but before either of you could say anything, the voice was back, squealing excitedly.

**_“DO YOU THINK THAT SHE COULD BE MY FRIEND, TOO?!”_ **

You smiled, how cute was that? “Well, I’d have to meet you before we could be friends,” you called, mindful of your son’s ears.

**_“REALLY!?!”_ **

You laughed softly. He sounded absolutely adorable. “Sure.” With a glance to Papyrus, you asked, “Would you like to come pick up your brother?”

The skeleton next to you raised a brow bone in your direction, but was cut off from saying anything by a little burble from Austin, who was reaching for your face.

And by the sudden burst of **_“OF COURSE! WHAT WOULD HE DO WITHOUT A COOL BROTHER LIKE ME TO LOOK AFTER HIM!”_** from the phone.

“Yeah, you’re the coolest, bro,” Papyrus was quick to agree as you cooed and grabbed your baby’s hand.

You relayed your address to Sans, and had to bite your lips to contain your squeal at the cuteness and Papyrus ended the call, giving you an odd look. You turned your gaze back to him and raised an eyebrow. “What’s wrong?”

“Is that how humans feed their babies? I thought you guys used bottles.” He took another sip of his tea, and you were glad to see that he looked so much better than he had after waking.

Pausing in lightly massaging your breast, you felt the blood rush to your face, giving you the complexion of a ripe tomato. “Oh my gods… this must look so strange to you.”

He chuckled, looking at you through the corner of his eye socket. “Well, I must _breastify,_ that this is a first.”

**_SNERK_**!

Oh gods, you just _had_ to make that sound again! “You did _not_ just say that!” you croaked around your withheld laughter, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Am I _milking_ this too much?”

You threw the receiving blanket at his head. “You’re awful!”

The blanket landed, covering half of his face. “Heh, don’t you mean _awfully punny_?”

_Pfft!_ You gave up on holding back your giggles.

Austin pulled away, his tiny belly full for now and your quieted down. “Guessing you’re done for now, huh, Little Man?” you cooed, tucking your breast back into your gown and buttoning it up. “Papyrus, can I have that blanket back?”

He passed it over, getting a nod of thanks from you, and watched as you folded the blanket in half before draping it over your shoulder. He blinked, watching you settle your son over the blanket and pat his back.

**_bu-URP!_ **

“There ya go!” you cheered, using the blanket to wipe a little bit of spit up off of Austin’s chin.

“Uh…”

Glancing over to your guest, you noticed his blinking sockets and giggled. “When human babies nurse, they have a chance of getting air in their stomachs, and they lack the ability to burp on their own, so, in order to avoid a fussing baby with a bellyache, you’re supposed to pat or rub their back until they burp,” you explained, standing to put your son back into the bassinet.

The skeleton’s teeth formed a small ‘o’ shape, causing you to blink. Seriously, how could he do that? Magic could only do so much!

A quiet set of chimes rang out from beyond the archway as you grabbed a clean blanket and tucked it around your son. He was sound asleep again. “Oh, I can put your clothes in the dryer now.”

“Oh yeah, I was wondering what happened to those,” Papyrus mumbled, stretching a little bit before downing the rest of his tea.

He followed you into the laundry room and leaned against the doorway as you pulled his hoodie out of the washer. “How _did_ you get a hold of my clothes, anyway, kiddo?”

A blush lit your cheeks as you looked back at him. “Oh, uh, well,” shit. You were an awful liar, and either way you worded it was going to make you sound like a creep. On the other hand, you could tell him the truth, and you could even figure out just why those goons had jumped him.

Why was everything so complicated?

“I found you, unconscious in an alley by the grocery store. You were pretty beat up, so I brought you back here. It just so happens that you were laying in some garbage and we both got covered in rotten vegetables, meat and cheese sauce,” you explained, turning the hoodie to look for the tear. “I figured I’d clean your clothes and I cleaned you up as best as I could. Aha!” You turned to show him the tear, “Once your clothes are dry, I can sew this up for you, too.”

He stared at you, lifting a brow bone. “Do you often bring strangers you find in an alley home? With your son here?”

You tossed the hoodie in the dryer, quickly followed by the rest of the small load, and turned to face him, hands on hips. “No. I’ve never brought anyone back to my home before, but I’ve also never found a Monster unconscious in an alley after being left for dead by seven guys.”

Papyrus blinked down at you. “What if I wanted to hurt you or Austin? Seems like a bad idea to me.”

You looked away from him, unsure of what to say. Your grandma had passed on stories to you and your little brother about Monsters, including tales of how the war started.

Prior to the war, no one had ever heard of Monsters harming humans. Their King and Queen had often taken in human children that had been separated from their families by bandits or accidents. Then, a priest from the church had learned of their ability to absorb human SOULs, even though at the time it had been little more than a rumor. The priest’s anti-monster teachings had spread like wildfire, sending people into a frenzy, which evolved into a full blown war.

You knew you had taken a chance in bringing him here, but you didn’t want those assholes to return and finish what they had started. In order to save his life, you decided to place your bet on the stories you had grown up on. But, how to explain that to the skeleton staring you down?

_(Outside – Same Time)_

“Thanks for the lift, Angie!” Axel called over his shoulder as he slid out of the large truck, his backpack in hand.

“You’re welcome, hun! Tell your sister to make sure she takes it easy now, okay?” the middle-aged brunette woman in the driver’s seat said, waving at the teenager. Her daughter waved as well, though she remained occupied by her phone.

“I will!”

As the bright red truck pulled away, towing the white trailer with it, Axel had to blink behind his glasses at the sudden appearance of a pale blue sport motorcycle idling before the driveway, its headlights blinding him for a moment.

He approached the driver, who was looking around as if lost, which, in all honesty, was a pretty common occurrence. He may have only lived about 15 minutes out of the city, but the maze of backroads made it near impossible to navigate, not to mention that the hills and dense trees block out the view of the city. Axel himself had found a lot of his classmates who had been playing “Pick a Road” who had wound up lost.

“Hello? Are you lost?” he asked, his gaze lighting on the metal covers over the rider’s shoulders. Were those pauldrons? What the fuck?

The rider flipped up the visor on their helmet, peering at the startled teen with baby blue lights where their eyes should be. “HELLO HUMAN! IS THIS 127 FOXTROT AVENUE?”

_Dude, you need to turn off the caps lock…_ “Uh, yeah. Why do you wanna know?”

The driver pulled into the driveway and turned off the bike, carefully putting down the kickstand before taking off his helmet. In the dim lighting, Axel nearly dropped his backpack as the grinning skull of a skeleton was revealed. “MY BROTHER IS HERE HAVING TEA WITH A NEW FRIEND OF HIS. I, THE MAGNIFICENT SANS, HAVE COME TO PICK HIM UP!”

“Oh…”

“DO YOU LIVE HERE AS WELL, HUMAN?” Oh, look at that, the skeleton just **fuCKING TELEPORTED IN HIS FACE!**

Axel yelped, falling over in shock. “Holy SHIT! Dude, don’t do that!” the teen exclaimed, right hand moving to clutch his shirt.

“I’M SORRY, HUMAN, I DIDN’T MEAN TO SCARE YOU, BUT YOU SHOULD WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE.” The skeleton reached down and pulled the teen to his feet by grabbing the hand that was clutching the boy’s chest.

_Damn, this guy’s strong!_ “Uh, okay… Come on in, I guess.” Axel turned to head to the door, pulling out his key as he went. When he opened the door, he glanced back at Sans, “Please take off your shoes just inside the door.”

He nodded, his smile still in place.

“ _Ane-chan, tadaima!_ _Daijōbudesuka_?” the teen called out in Japanese, toeing off his sneakers.

Your brother’s voice caused you to look up. That greeting was part of a code only used when something was wrong. The two of you had come up with it just after your mother’s passing. “ _Genkidesu! Okaerinasai!_ ” You called back, following the script and dodging around Papyrus to go to the front door. After a moment, though, you asked, “ _Anata wa komatteimasu ka?_ ”

“ _Iie!_ ” _Oh good. Nothing’s wrong then._

At the door, your brother was pushing his dark brown hair out of his eyes and sitting his overstuffed bag down. That was normal.

What wasn’t normal was his skeletal companion, who was toeing off his sky blue boots. They were wearing something that looked like silver armor over a gray t-shirt, navy blue pants and a sky bandanna as well as matching gloves. This skeleton, however, was only a few inches taller than you and your brother.

The skeleton turned to look at you, a large smile on his teeth. “OH HELLO OTHER HUMAN! ARE YOU THE ONE I TALKED WITH OVER THE PHONE?” he asked, er, bellowed.

Oh! Papyrus’s brother! You hadn’t realized that he was an adult, and his voice certainly sounded much deeper in person. “Oh, yeah, that’s me. You must be Sans, then,” you said with a smile, noticing how your own brother relaxed from the corner of your eye.

He grabbed your hand with a firm grasp and shook it hard enough to nearly knock you off your feet. “YES, I AM THE MAGNIFICENT SANS! THANK YOU FOR WATCHING OVER MY BROTHER!”

“Nice to see you too, bro,” came from behind you, and before you knew it, Sans had leapt over you to literally pounce on Papyrus.

The two crashed to the ground and you and Axel shared a wince.

“PAPY! YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME BEFORE THAT YOU WERE GOING TO A FRIEND’S HOUSE!”

Your brother looped an arm around your neck, his bright blue tipped bangs falling into his eyes. “So, Sis, why is he wearing your clothes?”

A chill ran up your spine. Uh-oh.

“Oh, she stripped me while I was asleep on the couch,” the taller skeleton said with a lazy grin, though you caught the glare that was pointed over his brother’s head in your direction.

“You what?!” Axel growled in your ear, making it ring.

Sadly, before you could attempt damage control, a familiar wail came from the living room.

Great, these _numbskulls_ had woken the baby. Why couldn’t your life be simple?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ane-chan, tadaima! Daijōbudesuka? – Big Sis, I’m home! Are you okay?  
> Genkidesu! Okaerinasai! – I’m fine! Welcome home!  
> Anata wa komatteimasu ka? – Are you in trouble?  
> Iie - No
> 
> So… eventful chapter, huh? And, new characters! What’s going to happen next? How’s Reader going to get out this mess? Guess you’ll have wait for the next chapter to find out!  
> Also, how would you guys react if I were to give Reader a name? I have an idea, but don’t want you guys to get angry about it, so, could you guys leave me a comment and tell me your thoughts on reader-inserts with named readers? I’d love to know your feelings!  
> Also, comments make me feel absolutely great! They make my day, mainly because you can give Kudos only once, but you can leave as many comments as you like!  
> See you guys next chapter!
> 
> *Edit*: I messed up on the Japanese :< It's fixed, now. Sorry guys!


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